Where am I? Who are you people?

It’s been a while since I’ve contributed anything here. Sorry, I figured the time was better spent doing the “Liar, Liar Pants On Fire” wiggle with Major Deadhead on Big Comfy Couch. Arcturo thinks that’s how a sane human acts. He’s naive to our ways, so I humor him. Honest, I don’t enjoy it at all. Really.

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I won’t be able to give a day-to-day account for a while. We’ve had to disconnect our satellite TV due to some financial setbacks. But Arcturo’s learning his ABCs and counting to 12, so hopefully somebody will hire him soon – once he learns to type. He wants to get into publishing or advertising, like his Papa. He also wants to drive a school bus, but I’m trying not to encourage that. 

For a while, I figured we could watch the ONE VHS tape that I recorded for him, so he could see his shows on the weekends, when they’re not broadcast. Watching the same episodes every day drove me insane, of course. But, like a dog that loves to chase the same stick over and over again, Arcturo loved the repetition. He knew exactly when his favorite parts were coming up. For me, it was sheer torture. I actually felt my brain playing solitaire. But I like Arcturo more than my brains, so I toughed it out. I wasn’t using those brains anyways.

So I had to do something. I have EyeTV on my computer, and I recorded a bunch of episodes of his shows before our satellite connection was cut off. But he didn’t enjoy watching them on the computer. I think his favorite thing about the shows, is that he gets to pull me away from the computer and pay complete attention to him. I converted these recordings to MP4s and loaded them into iTunes and onto my iPod. The next step was to get them to play from the iPod onto the TV.

I didn’t want to pay $90 bucks for the official Apple TV device, and I had read that you can use a simple AV cord which can be found on eBay for around $4. So being the cool guy that I am, I figured heck, I’ll go to RadioCrack and pick one up – it might be a few bucks more than $4, but I wouldn’t have to wait for delivery, right? RadioCrack wants $40 bucks for the freakin’ thing! So, off to eBay I go. Got one for $3 dollars, free shipping. RadioCrack can blow me. I’ll never learn though, I think I like to go in there just because I like the smell of electronics.

The AV cable arrived in the mail and I hooked the iPod up to the TV. The funny thing is, Apple “switches the colors” on you. On the AV cable, you have to plug the Red plug into the Yellow jack, the Yellow one goes in the White, and the White plug goes into the Red jack. I know, that’s crazy, but hey, it’s “proprietary”, right? The iPod feeds the audio and video through the headphone jack, so that end is simple.

To make a long story short, it worked like a charm – all for just $3 bucks. We’ve got some variety in our viewing now. I’m quite happy that we don’t have to watch Sheera and Loli’s Ditty Doodle Works anymore. Man, I hated the hell out of that show. I honestly wished harm on every person involved in that show. Don’t even get me started. In fact – maybe one of these days when I finally get over it, I’ll write a post here listing everything that I hated about that show.

Another thing I won’t miss is “Boner Boy”. That carrot topped Kid’s Fitness guy with the little penis. Arcturo doesn’t need to see him humping the ground yelling “Come on try it kids! Fitness is EXCELLENT!”

Yet another one we won’t miss is “Janet’s Planet”. We’ve been debating on alternate names for this one, it’s a toss-up between “Janet’s Anus” and “Janet’s Penis”. You’ve probably seen it – crazy lady dresses like Snow White in a Pants Suit. I remember her advice to kids being bullied was “If a bully says something bad to you, you walk up to him and say ‘Say that again’ …just walk away.” I want to give her a wedgie.

I may have this mentioned before, but Arcturo is very interested in learning to count to 12. Whenever Loonette does her clock stretch, he literally drags me to the TV and counts along as I point at each number and say “1, 2, 3, 4…”. He’s learning fast, pronounces most of the numbers somewhat understandable. Especially 8 – he likes saying 8. Once he gets it down I’ll test him on the individual numbers to see if he gets them right, as opposed to just counting them in order. Then on to Math.

He’s getting a kick out of the little commercials between shows where the kids do the “What can you do?” thing. He loves to parody the sounds the kids make, and laughs like crazy when we do some really silly sounds. He’s a ton of cute in a one ounce bag. See, I’m a big guy, and I’m used to his cuteness tricks, so I can handle it. A normal person like you, he’d melt your eyeballs. You know those cute little bluebirds in the old Walt Disney cartoons? He’d cute them back to Capistrano.

I’ll try to post more often here in the future. Once Arcturo gets a job and the money starts flowing in, that will give me more time to write. If you need to hire an artist, give him a shout. He’s only learning right now, so I’d be helping him for the most part. That way, you’re not only getting the cutest little bird doing your art, but me too for free.

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One Response to Where am I? Who are you people?

  1. Lisa says:

    Grinning..its good to see a new commentary. I’m sorry about the financial setback but sooooo understand it. Hopefully things will pick up for you. I am hanging in there!

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